Friday, December 08, 2006

My Slur will be PUNK not K Gay

Joey Porter is nuts and one BAD MoFo. I would not want to talk trash to him at all. Of course, self proclaimed Mr. Soldier, prima dona, K2 decided to start beef with Joey. Not only was that dumb, later in the game, he took a very cheap shot at Pitt LB James Farrior. It was one of the punk bitch hits I had seen in awhile(Not including Haynesworth foot drop). Game was over, total blowout, play was 20 yards away, a few seconds after the whistle, Winslow blindsided Farrior. I thought it was poetic justice that on the very next play, Farrior rocked KGgay and he dropped the ball. Farrior and Porter just started Yaking right in his face. I LOVED IT. KGay never looked like a bigger punk then right there. TO and Moss get alot of bad press as numero uno NFL enemy but Kgay has my vote for biggest classless bitch in the NFL. Still not my all time number one, Warren Sapp. His hit and behavior towards Chad Clifton a few years back will be hard to be topped. Clifton was in the emergency room and Sapps answer was that he deserved it. whatever punk, nice career decision in Oakland fat man.

Joeys gonna get fined and I never approve of homophobic slurs, but KGay is a bitch!!

More Proof that NO One Cares About the NHL

My Red Headed white El Guapo friend just showed me this A vote for Rory campaign. It is unbelievable. A bunch of dorks/geeks/Canadians that need to stop belching out "hoser" quotes all day, leave their igloos and actually go out looking for some poon. Instead, they decide that some hockey bum named Rory should start in the NHL All Star game. Guess what they have accomplished? He is one of the leading vote getters. I would write more, like paragraphs comparing it to other sports(Adonayl Foyle starting in NBA All Star game or Robert Fick being the NL's starting catcher) or saying its some travesty, but honestly, I am lazy and I do no really care. Im my view of the true American Sports fan, the NHL has lowered itself to just a nod above the MLS. Happy Friday Fockers!!

CNNSI Article

Vote For Rory

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Rally Around the Flag, Rally Around the Flag!!

USA! USA! USA! Nothing like some International sports compeition to get my American spirit boiling HIGH!! This is especially significant coming from someone who hates the site of every Support the Troops sticker or American Flag. Like my good friend and self proclaimed best dancer in Latin America, Scott Francis, once dead panned, "Who doesnt want to support the troops? No, I want them to DIE!!" Also, my liberal leanings are taking a back every time I hear God Bless America during the 7 inning stretch at Camden Yards instead of Take Me Out to the Ballgame. I feel the Bush Administraion has successfully used patriotic phrases and symbols to masquared their failed domestic and foreign policies ever since 9/11. Thus this makes me suspect to show any USA pride but give me an event where I can go after some foreigners to make fun of and in teh meantime, beat their ASS in the game we evented? I am Bleeding Red, White, and Blue, Baby.

I am your typical American sports fan who really doesnt like soccer too much, however, during my 3 week world cup fever spell, I wanted to beat some Italian Flopping ASS!! Let me tell ya, You come across the middle in OUR real football and have to go off on a stretcher after one of the 3 best young safeties in the league, Sean Spit Taylor, Troy P, Bob "the Hitman" Sanders lays some wood on ya? I will Guarantee you will be re-entering the game cuz you will be in a coma. No matter how much "Spray" you get blown over your greasy long hairded A$$!!

Back to the Fiba World Bball Championships in Japan as US downs Germany 85-65 to set up a Final 4 Match against Greece. Other side of bracket is world powerhouse matchup of Spain/Argentina. All teams are a combined 28-0. I hate Ginobli, Nocconi, and pretty much all of Argentina. I want US to crush them in the final, but I would like to see Spain beat them too. I am torn.

First things first, lets break down what US needs to do in order to beat Greece. What I do know about is Greece that they lack the big name NBA star firepower, the other 3 remaining all star squads have. They are team oriented and the defending 2005 Eurobasket champs. By far will be the most formiable team the US has faced so far.

However I am not buying into the Doom and Gloom underling storyline of most American sports pundits. They can not wait to bury this team as spolied underachievers or another failed experiment. I am still confused about the overall apathy and downright hatred of USA basketball by americans. If they win and do not blow some out like what happened against Italy, everyone rips them. Close Call, we are going to get beat by the better teams. And if they struggler for spurts in games likes they did against Germany, Slovenia, or Puerto Rico,picks apart their faults. Even though the beat every team handily. I do not undertand it at all.

Here is a newsinternet flash real quick, its 2006, not 1992. Dream Team is over and the wolrd has caught up. Paging bitter American Sports white male sportswrite, Get Over it. Ming, Dirk, Gasol, Ginobli, Parker would probably Compete for a NBA title, if not win it. The Days of us acting like its an And 1 video, and still taking home gold are LONG over. Talent alone will not win it anymore, the last 2 world contests have proven this. We all know this but for some reason, the media and the sports fans stubborn GBush/Rummy egos have a hard time accepting it. Instead of taking Rasta Marleys advice and Rallying around the flag/team, we pessimestically attack them.

Can anyone please comment on their thoughts of why the think this is?

Am I the only one excited about whats going on with the USA team? Mello playing defense and becoming a go to big time leader? DWade, selfishly coming off the bench, even though he is the baller with the most trash talking power by his finals MVP trophy. How bout becoming an all around playmaker, and finding his teammates shots over his own? Or the youthful frontline rotation of DHowardand CBosh, crashing the boards? Or the willingness to play defense at times and oversome adversity?Or the Suns style of running and gunning? Suns O with Duke D has been a great mix. I see more positives than negatives with this team. They still crushed most teams and have only had a month of playing together compared to other teams bheing together most of their lives!!
Here is a role breakdown of each player, highlighting the invidual needs in order to Taste some Gold.

Cp3 has been a fresh change at the point, compared to the of the last american PGs we rolled out. Baron Davis, Andre Miller and Marburry killed our teams in international play. Either Took too many bad shots(BDavis in 02)or just couldnt hit a shot at all(Miller in 02) or plain sucked at being a true ball distributing PG(Starburry 04) CP3 needs to continue to aggresive attack the rim. He has stuggled at times in over passing and not taking open looks. He can hit open 3 but rather see him is at his best going to the riml, either hitting 10 foot floater or dishing it off. His hesitation dribble and court vision, especially in transition are lethal. He must keep pushing the ball, limit his turnovers against expereinced guards and make sure to play some defense. I am still having a hard time getting that Arroyo torching out of my head, even though his defense has been average to solid since.

Kirk Hinrich. I am biased and still believe Gilbert Arenas could play his role and is twice the player, but Hinrich has played solid. He has hit open 3s, pushed the ball effectively up the court, and limited turnovers. He played his best overall game against Germany, starting in the second half. However, his defense was atrocious during the pool play, bottom line, it sucked more than Snakes On a Plane. The Key for Kirk "on the Mother Fn" Hinrich will be stopping stop dribble penetraion against the tougher guard competition he will face in the Final 4.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Hemp Love

“It would be the end of outdoors marijuana,” said Jack Heber, 67, a marijuana historian and author who runs a group called Help End Marijuana Prohibition, or HEMP. “If it gets mixed with that crop, it’s a disaster.”

“It would take a joint the size of a telephone pole to have an impact,” he said.

These quotes are awesome. I am actually shocked that someone has finally figured out that it would
A. Be dumb to grow industrial Mary Jane Hemp with the Good Stinky Stuff, the government is SOOO worried about stopping. Cause Cross polination would ruin the "Good kind." And

. The amount of THC in Hemp Mary jane is so low that, a person would have to suck all their lungs out of their body just to get a normal High. Listen to Woody Harrleson, and Legalize Hemp for your economy, Governator.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Ms Pac Man Got Ate by a Ghost, Thrown in CLink, AGAIN!!

This story comes as a shocker to No one. Titans CB, Adam, "Pac Man" Jones gets pinched for disorderly contact. Maybe PMan was mad at all the street cred Bengals WR Chris Henry was getting in the offseason, by his 4 arrests in like 5 months. Pman had at least 2 before even playing a snap for the Titans last season. Then had a famous Ebonic laced tirade on a Local TV Reporter, I am too lazy to find the link but I am sure its on deadspin by now.

At first glance at this story on, it sounded like Pac Man got Fd by the Cops and some drunk psycho bizzo. Having Dealt with stubborn, Ahole cops, plenty of times in my life, I always take the side of the victim. It only takes One "Barney Fife wannabe, I got picked on my whole life& didnt have date to homecoming," wannabe cop to take you to the pokey. And I am white, not a black man. Minorities get totally Fd and profiled by the Pigs. Plus, crazy, crying girls, NEVER get arrested, especially if they are hot.

On further review, sounds like, "Ms Pac Man," deserved it. Why do you give your wallet to some girl? I mean, sounds like you have an Entourage( This is based off one of his cars being involved in a drug bust last year, somebody was driving it around, slinging rock, must be part of his posse) but you cant keep your wallet in your pocket or give it to one of your bros?

Plus, its a wallet, cancel your cards and get a new ID, that is about it man, not that big of a deal. If someone stole her purse like she claims, you trusted the girl enough to give her your wallet but now you dont trust her to be telling the truth about someone stealing it? You are a dumbass then. But of course Ms. Pac Man wasnt finished, He had to get one last verbal blast, aka one last "Ghost Chomp," to the cops as he rode away in his car, instead of just playing it safe. I learned my lesson the hard way, spending a 2nd Half in the Kinnick Stadium jail, cuz I told a pig to F off under my breath, after he arrested me for underage drinking. They win, you lose, always. At least temporarily, until you pay some high priced billing leach lawyer to get the chargers dropped.

Anyway, According to Local Radio, I guess he cried on his way to the Clink, hence his new nickname: Ms. Pac Mac.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Monday, March 06, 2006

F Coach K

Not only has Duke gotten every call and every break for the last decade, ESPN basically broadcasts every one of their games, even when they play Sisters of the Poor. There isn't a college basketball fan alive that doesn't recognize that Dick Vitale is in love with Duke. "the DUkies, Cameron Crazies!" Hell, ESPN had 3 broadcasts going of the same game on Saturday nite, Unprecedented. Now Coach K thinks he is getting a raw deal by the media? Cuz Sheldon Williams crushes dudes but never seems to get in foul trouble? or when he does, you lose, cuz you haven't recruited any low post players at all? Who is this bias media against Duke? ESPN? That is laughable, some other Sports media? Coach K was on PTI, Live Chat on ESPN, Sportscenter, and ESPN gameday, and ABC Sunday, in less than 3 days. This was all negative air time?

Plus, for some reason, Coach K got little criticism for cowardly taking his good players off the court and putting in scrubs against FSU. Im still flabbergasted his ambivalent toward winning this game. His team is down 3, with 1.8 secs left. FSU misses 2 FTs, Duke has a chance to tie the game with a halfcourt or midcourt shot. Its very unlikely, but earlier in the season, BlueDevils Guard, Sean Dockerty nailed a running 45 footers to beat VaTech. But No Coach K says he was worried about the safety of his players after FSU premature rushed the court. Not his scrubs health, only his star players. who would you have shooting a half court shot, Reddick or some Walk on tool?

I have no problem with storming the court at all, I think its great. My problem is when Fans do it after games they should have won. Iowa's home win over Indy, West Virginia's W over Pitt are 2 recent examples of horrible storms by dumb college nerds.

So the media bought all of his Coach K's better than you logic of ordering his players off the court, and now he is crying about the media being biased. How bout the last time you won the national title in 2001, Maryland outplayed in the National Semifinal game, but for some reason, the refs wanted to foul out Lonnie Baxter on 2 HORRIBLE calls. Totally determined the outcome of the game cuz Baxter was killing the Blue Devils. I am sure there are many more calls over the years, that are just blatant. Hey Mike, stop crying about the refs, and worry about how Tyler Hansborough exposed your inside Defense and Carolina took it to you at home on Senior Nite. Better not lose in the ACC tourney, or that will be 3 in a row, or 3 in 4 or 5 games, Limping into the tourney, so you can get bounced. Ouch that hurts. Coach K, go F Yourself.

Monday, February 20, 2006


Alright, My 2pages of game notes was washed in the washer and destroyed. So Im not to happy about re racking my brain to finish writing about this glorified pickup game. Here is my preview, its probably more entertaining than writing about the game would have been. Plus I want to rip on Coach K, real quick.

The 2006 NBA All Star Gane was TIZIGHT!! Actually the game was pretty sloppy, shooting was as chilly as Old Man winter has been this Prez Day weekend, and only the 2nd half provided any assemblance of a real bball game. The East overcame a 17 point halftime defecit to edge out the West by 2. DWade made a key follow up with 20 secs left, and TMac's tying jump shot attempt was tipped(or maybe fouled) by Bron Bron, falling short. Bron Bron was named MVP.

The All Star game just isnt about who lobed an Alley Oop to who or what player had the sick ankle breaking crossover. Over the years, it was about what new black Air Jordans that MJ was debuting, which rapper/actor was sitting in the front row and how ridiclous his outfit was. Or how bad or good the music acts were. This year's games had plently of those highlights.

I decided to do my own NBA blog for the game. Its more of a recap of the game quarter by quarter, expanding on my thoughts. It will not come close to what Sports Guy does, cuz well that is just insanse and Im not getting paid. One side note, its just me on my leather couches with a notebook, writing down my observations of the broadcast. No Mary Jane is inolved, no spliffys have been rolled and I did not pick up any OE for the game. I am still shocked that only the Birdman gets rolled for drugs, which btw, wasnt pot or roids, but some hard core unnamed drug. I plan on getting to the bottom of this. 2 years, costing him millions? seems harsh and somewhat BS.

Sorry, I tend to get off topic, I apologize, you should see me when I talk in person, especially after having a few "pops" in me, watch out!! Im sure my 3 friends who are reading this right now, are chuckling in agreement.

I do not have a headphone set making a podcast, aka, Mark Cuban, cheering for every time my favorite player, not Dirk, but Bullets, Bambi 2 luvin, Big Game Gil Arenas. Im going to put up the link of his Bambi 2 quote from the Wash Post, awesome, I love Gil.

I need to hang out with this dude sometime soon. It might be hard since he is in the gym shooting at 5am and plays pickup games in Southeast DC. 2 places you probably are not going find this whiteboy. I just wished he had a better number than zero. But hey, that is Gil. LOVE GIL, everyone likes to hate on him for some reason I dont get it. He is quicker and stronger than anyone in the NBA, period. He can get to the rack anytime he wants and no one can check him at all. Maybe AI, Tony Parker, and TJ ford might be a shade quicker, but all of them are much smaller than Gil, and they cant finish in traffic like he can. He averages 6 dimes a game so the criticism of him not passing it doesnt fly too far. I LOVE GIL, Love him. Thanks Golden State and Gary St.Jean for not clearing up cap room to resign him. One Big Thanks for GM Ernie Grunfeld, who has many made savy moves since taking over, with Gil's signing as the numero uno flagship move to resurect this doormant Bullet Franchise. Sorry back to the Blog.

Pregame Festivities

The choreograhped Dance moves by the West and East All Star was nearly as entertaining as the game. Yao Ming doing the human wave, that is funnier than almost every skit on SNL right now. I wish the TV shot would have stayed on Yao. Reminded me of the horrible camera production team decision when the Bus ran out onto the field first at the beginning on the Super Bow, and they cut away from him. Bad Work Truck. Anyway, Vince Carter displayed he is far better at dance moves than playing defense or through injuries. The usual suspects Shaq and KG threw in their high caliber comedy Shaq with a Heart attack dance and KG with a Egyptian Strut. Marion surpised me with a Shimy Shake Move.

I hope the teams keep adding more and more to this every year. Definitely a top 5 highlight of the All Star weekend by far. The Sympathnoy Orchestra was a refreshing add too. They even busted into a Crazy Train instrumental. I had some fraternity hazing flashbacks, "it only gets colder boys." No one gets that, there is a reason, and yet, its still funny to me. OH college, damn I miss it. Canadian Anthem was well, the OH Canadian National Anthem. I still do not see the need for it but OH well, its not hurting anything I guess.

Destiny's Child version of the anthem was really good and I usually hate the national anthem. I just dont think its a very good song and yes, Im sure that makes me a commie somehow. I just figured out yesterday I gave over 15K to Uncle Sam in taxes last year, so that gives me some serious Corp Cred to rip on our song. Its pretty much impossible for me to stay on topic and not mention out shitty govt in any writings. Now, "Take Me out to the Ballgame", or "In Heaven, there is no Beer," 2 damn good songs.

My roomate Russennator(Im glossing him that cuz this NBC Oylmpic announcer kept referring to this German skier as the Hermanator, over and over, much to Russ's displeasure) made a comment that they looked aneroxic, which is probably true but I think Beyonce still has her famous thick thighs. Beyonce looked SMOKE N too and I can never figure out for the life of me which one got kicked out. Michelle maybe? I always forget.

Back to Beyonce, Was there a player not on the court who didnt want to bang her? Every black player does for sure. Everytime I read anything about an athlete talking about their dream girl, its almost always her. Only maybe Halle Berry is a distant second. Since all the american white boys suck in the NBA( huge blog coming on this, research is done, and Im hoping it gets me able to post on deadspin. I just found out its by invite only last week) It is down to the Euros and the Hoser Canadian. Nash isnt a hoser, I just wanted to use it. I had the movie Strange Brew on the brain

I can see Nash wanting to crush it, she is a total upgrade from Posh Spice for sure. Gasol looks stoned and like he would HIT anything. I have faith that YAO has became americanized NBA style enough where groupies have thrown themseleves at him, where he is like damn, this girl is hotter than all of them. My only worry would be about the German Dirk. I can see him wrecking my whole theory on this. I think he would want to Brokeback Mtn with Jay Z more. I have heard this before from a legit NBA source.

Yes, It only took that long to have a gay Brokeback Mtn reference. Maybe there is something good to come out of this movie, you can call your straight friend gay without actually using saying it, and its infinitely more funny to use Brokeback Mtn, it is not as offensize, to ya know, gay people. I knew sooner or later political correctness through pop culture would come back around. No, I am still got going to see it either. For entertainment reasons, not homophobic ones.

I am sorry again, for those of you who care that much about the NBA All Star game, to get this far reading, I applaud you. Honestly I forgot where I was. What is even more alarming is that Im looking at 3 pages of notes I have not mentioned yet. God Bless the Internet.

The Game-"Make Some Noise, Let's Play Ball"

YAO is just trying to steal the show, isnt he? His english is all grown up! Thanks to David Stern and his Sternazitaion of the NBA product worldwide, Yao will start every year in this game, forever. China has a Bill to our 280 mil people and they probably make people vote for him or they get jailed. Why care about human rights, when they can make our US products for cheap, steal our jobs, and pollute the earth like we do, with less restrictions.

I like Yao, but he will never dominate in the NBA ever. Rik Smits, Sikma, Zman, or Mark Eaton. I dont remember the home team's player ever addressing the crowd before a game before, maybe this has happen. Which lead to the question, who talks in Vegas next year? Tark the Shark? LJ, Augmon and Greg Anthony? they all made more in college than in the NBA right? The HBO's Callgirls dude? the options are endless. That reminds me, I need to book my flight and hotel to vegas that weekend. NBA is FuNtastic.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Shredding it, YO


Who Says the Oylmpics Suck?
Well, I do but Snowboarding Bunnies
are Killer BRA!

Sportscenter, Now that is just DUMB!

Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention. I've just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story. I need all of you, to stop what you're doing and listen. Cannonball!

Ron Burgundy. Stay classy, San Diego. Hello, Baxter? Baxter, is that you? Bark twice if you're in Milwaukee. Is this Wilt Chamberlain? Have the decency to say something!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006


Ladies and Gentlemen, Our 2006 WHITE HOUSE Press Team.

Lets see, VP shoots a man, its an accident, but for some reason, they wait 18 hours to tell the press, turn a sheriff deputy away who came to interview Dick on Sat nite, and then finally have some rancher lady release the information to a 2bit Local daily rag? I think the Muppets run a better press office than these clowns. This violates every rule of press relations. Even some Press Intern in a Freshman Congressman's office knows this, but somehow the Administration doesnt? Did anyone go to Journalism school over there? I know they have a media war room, come on now, why they coverup? a very bad one at that.

Now with the Usual "Campaign Mode Spin" from the Administration. "Well I dont know, ask the VP's office, its their decision. HUH? VP shoots a guy and White House has no comment and doesnt think its relevant? They pass the buck? Reporters want facts and reasons why you acted so shady about all the details. When I found about this intialy on Sunday afternoon, my first thought was he shot this guy on Sunday morning. I find out it was later but still no Dick, no real reports about anything. But the WH came out with their new game plan.

Blame Victim

Blame victim, yes its his fault for getting shot. You know when I clipped that jogger on the side of the road with my SUV, it was the jogger's fault for not wearing white at nite. Not mine at all, he was reckless. Reminds me of when the lesbian lady got mauled by an exotic dog in San Fran few years back, the dog owner blamed the lady for wearing a certian perfume that set the dog off. Sure, Unbelievable rationale, but wait, there is more.

More Jokes

Lets joke about it. Jeb shows up with an orange pin on his blazer, cracking one liners. GW makes a bad joke to Kofi Annan. WH Press Hack kids that about the Texas Longhorns Orange colors.

Do you think the 78 year old lawyer family finds humor in this incident? Since I wrote this, Whittington had suffered a heart attack caused by the pellets. I was going to add all these DUCK hunt jokes and have some pictures, but I mean, this guy could die. He is 78. Plus, with the secrecy surronding the shooting detials, and the lack of a public comment from Cheney himself, dont you think its a premature to be serving up one liners?

White House Strategy

Scott Mc No Kneck could be one the worst spokesperson in the modern era. I mean he is awfull, all of my friends agree, even the Republican ones. He NEVER EVER says anything substantive at all and he mumbles worse than his boss. "Its on going invesitagation, Im not going to answer hypotheticals, must ask the VP office, blah, blah, blah" But I actually have some pity for him cuz he obviously was not calling the shots here, Rove and Big Dick were. One side note, Does anyone ever think GW holds anyone accountable for anything?

"Like dude, you are fired. I know it sucks, its probably not soley your fault, but you are in charge and I have to make a decision to get rid of you for underperforming."

I would love one example where someone thinks these words actually come out of our presidents mouth.

Its like if he owned the Rangers again, he would never fire the GM or Manager if they kept finishing in last place year after year. Well, GW, your administration's performance Katrina, the War, and Plamegate is competing with the Tampa Devil Rays for the AL east Cellar. Especially your press team, they hit worse than Christin Guzman does in BP. Im not the only who sees that too. Half the country thinks you suck, only 40 percent even like that you are in charge. I could go on and on. Im sorry, the 2 fans of MacGs world, I have tuns of material in my notepad, its time to put it on my BLOG. During my Hiatus, I was monikered, "DC's best kept secret" by Bogack Attack on his blog. Well, I feel honored and now its time for me to live up to my end of the bargain. Life as a MacG,
"Fd around and got a tripple double, today was a good day"

Feisty Press exchange